This week it was reported that 21 people were burned in one of Tony Robbin’s FIREWALKS in San Jose, CA.  

This came just weeks after Oprah and her Team did a firewalk with Tony. I have never been to one of Tony’s firewalks, but I have used firewalks in my Conditions of Deliverance retreats for women.  

Here is the main difference with my firewalks.  It appears that Tony has you in the ZONE suggesting “MIND over MATTER” which is an extremely valuable lesson when facing your FEARS. 

Here is the difference in our firewalk and his.

  1. When I first starting doing firewalks, I followed Tony’s lead and did the Mind over Matter approach. Bad idea for the smart women who I attract to my events. We are out in nature, and away from the parking lots of corporations, and yes, we actually start with a real bondfire, but we began to notice a few important details.
  2. First, I began to notice the person who owned the land, who I contracted to build the fire, the firewalks had some “major issues” [burning issues] with women.  Every time someone walked on a fire that he tended, someone got burnt. We realized that the person who was “tending” the fire was the person who was putting his/her energy into the fire.  So the next time I ran a retreat, I chose a “fawn-like” person to tend the fire.  She was so sweet, so innocent, so caring.  She only had GENTLE energy, which is what the DEER card teaches us to use when we are facing our FEARS.
  3. Next, I realized that Mind over Matter was not the best approach for the smart women who I attract to my events. What we discovered that was soooo much better for my participants was to learn

how to listen to your intuition clearly when asking for guidance

What this means is that you were told to notice the hype all around you because we were chanting, beating a drum, dancing and getting excited to take a turn as we put our big goals on the far side of the fire and we would be leaving behind anything that would be holding us back in the fire.  

But how many times have your bought something because of the hype and the excitement and later had buyer’s remorse.  

Have you dated someone who knew how to put his best foot forward and then after you shared your sweets, you found out he was a heel?  

So my approach was to teach you to feel those exciting feelings, those butterflies that we love to feel, but to learn how to separate the HYPE from what is BEST for YOU. I taught our group to walk up to the fire [to the starting point] and to say:  

Are you my fire? 

If the answer was YES, then it was appropriate for you to walk.  

But it was your job to sort out if that YES was coming from the desire to be like everyone else; your desire to do it because you had paid for it; your desire to do it because you were here and may never get another chance like this. All of those reasons are the very reasons that have gotten you into trouble in the past, right?

So slow down Nelly, take a deep breath and ask again: Are YOU my fire? 

If your YES came from your core and you knew it was from your core, then this was your time to walk across the coals, to leave any limiting beliefs behind you in the fire, and to open your arms to the new possibilities that you are choosing to walk toward when you set your intentions before you began. 

If you heard a NO in your head/heart after asking: “Are you my fire?“, or if you got NO answer when you asked, then it was your job to announce to the group “this is not my time”. 

Yes, you could get back in line to wait for another turn, but THIS was not YOUR time

How many of you would have been frightened to say NO if the face of everyone who expected a YES?  Are you able to get a clear Yes-No when you pray for an answer? Now when you told the group “This is not my time” we celebrated you for the victory of being able, of being willing to hear and obey your intuition and say NO at a time when you had lots of peer pressure to perform something extraordinary.   

I think learning to say NO at a time when there is alot of peer pressure to do something is extraordinary!  

How many of our children need to learn how to ask “Are you my fire?” to the many temptations they are offered.   

Do you listen to your intuition? And have you noticed that the second time around is easier to hear a definite YES or NO? 

The second time around has given you some courage, confidence and some wisdom to draw upon.

Hopefully you are a fast learner or you could get burnt the second time around, the third time around, and so on.  

That is the LIFE LESSON that I teach at my firewalk. You will always get an answer to the inner questions you ask of yourself. 

The big Secret is to  discover if you are willing to listen and to obey YOUR intuition and to let go of the noise of the crowd. 

“Being true to yourself … despite the noise of the crowd … is a mark of self-completion.” Quote by Jane A. Herron


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